I can't help but notice that I have a lot of negativity surrounding me. Of course, I find the silver lining in everything, but I have become used to being negative. It's a habit with my friends and I... We find it humorous... All in all, I am finding it EXTREMELY difficult to be more positive. It's taking way too long, and I am having to bite my tongue whenever I have something negative/clever to say. Do you guys know what I'm talking about?? The situation where someone says something that you know you can make fun of. It's ripe for the picking. So you say it but it ends up hurting that persons feelings, and making everyone else feel awkward. Yep... that's what I am trying to defeat. The only conclusion I can come to that pertains to helping me achieve my "positive" goal is surrounding myself with more positive people.
Now, this doesn't mean that I am going to removing all of my friends out of my life. I wouldn't do that. I just need to add more positive people in. And I don't want to make this blog about religion, but it wouldn't hurt to find a group of nice christian friends, because I really need God in my life right now. To tell you the truth, I am still in my "unhappy" funk that I was in when I wrote my first blog post. Like I said, it's taking forever. I wish there was an easy button I could push that made everything better. I could push it and be rich and famous, and able to pay for college in a flash. Sadly, there is nothing like that so I have to survive this journey before things are handed to me on a silver platter. And even then, it's not that easy.
You want to know what I am really tired of? And I know you will agree. I'm tired of waiting for things to happen. Why can't I just be brave and take risks?! It's exhausting. I have no idea what's holding me back.
I really hope some of you are feeling what I am feeling? And I hope you can feel comfortable enough to talk about it with me. Maybe we can get through this together.
AK
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